On My Radar

I've come to find out that the qualities I possess in which initially attract people ultimately end up repelling them in some way. Its interesting to reflect back on my previous friendships and the basic fact that they all revolve around whatever grade I'm in and therefore whoever I'm closest too. There doesn't seem to be or has been one person or group of people who have transcended this and continued to be considered a friend. Thinking of highschool especially I can remember pretty much what group of friends (who am I kidding, what group of girls) I hung out with every year, changing every year. For whatever reason we seem to move on from each other, I'd like to think growing or progressing and taking what we've learned or accomplished and moving on. Its funny how whenever your with a friend or group of friends you'll say 'were going to be friends forever' but thats usually when for me the shit hits the fan. Something for whatever reason happens and you run a miss. There are a few people I will never say that about as I don't want that to happen to us. Sort of like a mental 'knock on wood' type of thing, but heres hoping. 


There have been people from highschool that I knew I would probably never talk to again, their have been friends that have said their only going to keep in touch with a small group (once including me, but thats another story). For that reason I'm really interesting in attending my highschool reunion in 2021, I really am interested in finding out what has happened to these people. I recently read on Twitter a quote saying "nobody wants to help you until you've made it". Which kind of proves true as in for some reason everybody comes crawling back. I believe in karma, I believe in honesty and I believe in loyalty above all. But I know of only one person currently that I can place those values upon. Upon reflecting on these relationships both successful and knowledgeable I look inwards and try to think about what I could have done to affect its outcome. 


I guess I've made a couple of theses posts this year, so it seems that this was the biggest lesson I learned. For those of you who have read to this part, I'm not to sure if this post has brought you any knowledge. I like to read things when I can take something from them and apply it to my own life. But If theres one thing its to only trust your blood, your family. 


I think Lauren Conrad said it best...